noun: firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something
Started my day with a ton of anxiety. If you have anxiety, does it physically manifest in your body? How? For me, my brain feels like it’s full of static. I want to say that it feels hot, but that’s not quite right, it’s more that there’s a lot of friction from all the thoughts and non-thoughts moving around up there. I’m going on vacation for the weekend tomorrow, and there are things that I absolutely HAVE to get done today. Things that should have been done a month ago. Things that I can’t let myself put off anymore, even though I don’t feel like I have everything I need to complete them. The problem is that part of my brain is saying “fuck it” because I’ve already waited this long, so why not wait til Monday?
Don’t play me, brain.
So, I pulled out my meditation app and went outside for a few minutes when I got to work, because today just has to work. The shortest free meditation was about Trust, so walked outside to reset for 10 minutes. I needed the word “trust” to sit in my head, pushing out the static and grounding me. I still feel anxious, but every time it starts to rise up to the top of my mind instead of my work, I let “trust” to float back in and replace it. I am learning to trust myself, my instincts, my personality, so that I can let my true self flourish.
“Trust, that you’re going to shift gears from forcing a situation to happen to trusting that the highest and the best will happen, whatever that may be.”