Even though it’s been a relatively good week for me, I am feeling extremely anxious today. Sometimes we just can’t control the chemical balance in our brains and anxiety creeps up despite your best intentions.
I went for a run earlier this week and didn’t have any music along. Instead, I kept talking to myself, reminding myself that I can do anything.
“I am strong. I am motivated. I am smart. I am intelligent. I am wise. I am patient. I am flexible. I am creative. I am innovative.”
Every different word I used would inspire a new word. Sometimes, the words didn’t feel quite true, but if I changed my inflection (in my head), it could feel different. For example, “I am patient,” doesn’t feel true very often, but I know, and I need to tell myself, that I can be patient. I don’t have to be all of these words of strength all the time, and by the same token I can be all of them at the same time. There is a duality. Eventually, I changed the phrase from “I am,” to “I can be,” or other phrases.
“I am up for the challenge. I can do hard things. Every time I try, it will get easier. This hill used to feel hard, now it feels flat. I can get better. I improve every day. Today is a new day. I can change directions if today isn’t going how I want it to be – I can choose how today goes. I can be steadfast, and I can change my mind.”
Some phrases I would repeat over and over, either in a row or between thoughts. There were certain characteristics that I want to work on, that aren’t habitual yet, that I am improving on, and those would repeat throughout my “meditation.” Some didn’t resonate, and I didn’t need to repeat them more than once.
I highly advise this kind of self-talk. Don’t listen to yourself, talk to yourself. I’ve found that it gives me more power over negative thoughts.
I am feeling a ton of anxiety today, but I have the power to change how my day is going. I don’t have to succumb to my brain chemistry today.
I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul.
– From Invictus by William E. Henley